As I mature, I have learned more about the true meaning of love. Do you know that there are 3 Stages of Love: first is Falling in Love, second is Falling Out of Love, and the third is Deciding to Love. The third kind of love is an action verb. I deepened my understanding of this when I got married. Me and my husband dated for 3 years. We emailed each other or talked almost everyday. We laugh when we reminisce about some of our conversations because it was like a job interview. We took personality tests and compared notes. We shared our values, hopes and expectations. We attended seminars that taught us tools to acquire in a healthy relationship. And we were best of friends. I thought because of this, our marriage would be like a walk in the park. We still had struggles. That’s when my love muscles were developed, formed and strengthened. Even if we thought we have good communication skills; unconscious beliefs that I was not aware of surfaced. I learned the hard way I cannot forced him to be somebody he is not. I felt stuck for sometime. But I love him. For the grace of God, I searched and found healthy options. I joined online programs that helped me become a better person. Prayer and meditation helped me a lot. I decided to stretch myself. I committed myself to continue to grow as a person, and to become a more loving and happy wife. It is a process.
My Life’s Lessons
I ACCEPTED THAT I CANNOT CHANGE A PERSON. I CAN ONLY CHANGE MYSELF.
I DECIDED THAT I AM 100% COMMITTED TO MY INFORMED CHOICES
I LOVE MY SELF. I do a mirror exercise taught by Mindvalley and Jack Canfield, co-author of Chicken Soup for the Soul. I look in the mirror and tell myself: I am enough, I am lovable, I am beautiful, etc. I do this daily. This exercise is very empowering. I believe in myself more, meaning less insecurities.